The Myth of Eros and Psyche: A Love Story with Toxic Undertones
The myth of Eros and Psyche is one of the most captivating and enduring love stories from Greek mythology. While it’s often depicted as a romantic tale, a deeper look reveals elements of control, power imbalance, and manipulation, which today might be seen as signs of a toxic relationship. This ancient myth has inspired countless adaptations in literature, film, and modern media, reflecting its timeless relevance.
In this blog post, we’ll explore the myth of Eros and Psyche, delve into some lesser-known details, and discuss how this story has been portrayed in recent popular culture, including films, TV series, and books.
Who Were Eros and Psyche?
In ancient Greek mythology:
- Eros, also known as Cupid in Roman mythology, was the god of love and desire. He is typically portrayed as a winged god with a bow and arrow, capable of making both gods and mortals fall in love.
- Psyche was a mortal woman whose beauty was so extraordinary that people worshiped her, comparing her to Aphrodite, the goddess of love and beauty.
Their love story begins when Eros is sent by his mother, Aphrodite, to punish Psyche for her beauty, but instead, he falls in love with her. However, their relationship is marked by secrecy, betrayal, and a series of trials, leading many to view the myth through the lens of toxic dynamics.
The Story of Eros and Psyche: Love, Secrecy, and Betrayal
The myth of Eros and Psyche unfolds in several dramatic phases:
- Aphrodite’s Jealousy and Eros’ Betrayal:
Psyche’s beauty angers Aphrodite, who instructs her son Eros to make Psyche fall in love with a hideous creature. However, when Eros sees Psyche, he is struck by her beauty and falls in love with her. Instead of following Aphrodite’s orders, Eros secretly takes Psyche to a magnificent palace where he visits her every night, but there’s a catch: Psyche is forbidden from seeing his face. This secretive relationship, where Eros controls all aspects of their interaction, could be seen as toxic by modern standards. There’s a lack of transparency and trust, with Psyche kept in the dark—literally and metaphorically—about her lover’s identity. - Psyche’s Curiosity and Eros’ Abandonment:
Psyche’s sisters, jealous of her luxurious life, convince her that her husband might be a monster. In a moment of doubt, she lights a lamp while Eros is asleep to see his face. Upon discovering that her lover is the god Eros, she accidentally spills oil on him, waking him. Feeling betrayed by her lack of trust, Eros abandons Psyche, leaving her alone and heartbroken. This element of the story highlights the fragility of trust and the imbalance in their relationship. While Psyche is isolated and controlled, Eros holds all the power. - The Trials of Psyche:
Desperate to win Eros back, Psyche seeks out Aphrodite, who subjects her to a series of impossible tasks. These tasks are symbolic of the trials one might endure in a toxic relationship—Psyche must prove her love by facing increasingly dangerous and humiliating challenges. These include sorting seeds, retrieving wool from violent golden sheep, collecting water from the River Styx, and finally, descending into the Underworld to retrieve a box of beauty from Persephone. Each task seems designed to break Psyche’s spirit, yet she perseveres. - The Reconciliation:
After completing the tasks, Psyche is forgiven by Eros, who, moved by her determination, pleads with Zeus to grant her immortality so they can be together forever. Psyche becomes a goddess, and the two are reunited. While this may seem like a happy ending, the power dynamics remain skewed. Psyche had to go through extreme hardships to win back Eros, reinforcing the idea that love in this myth is conditional and tied to suffering.
Lesser-Known Details of the Eros and Psyche Myth
While the general outline of the myth is well known, there are some lesser-known details that offer deeper insight into their relationship:
- Psyche’s Name and Symbolism:
In Greek, the name “Psyche” means soul or breath of life, which is symbolic of her journey through the trials set by Aphrodite. Psyche’s journey can be interpreted as the soul’s quest for love and fulfillment, enduring hardships to reach a higher state. In this sense, the myth can also be read as an allegory of self-discovery and the transformation of the soul through suffering. - The Role of the Gods:
The involvement of Aphrodite and other gods in the story reveals much about the hierarchy of relationships in Greek mythology. The gods frequently meddle in the lives of mortals, often to satisfy their own desires or egos. Aphrodite’s jealousy drives much of the plot, showcasing how toxic family dynamics (between mother and son) can influence romantic relationships. - The Pomegranate Connection:
Like the myth of Persephone and Hades, Psyche’s consumption of food from the Underworld binds her to a divine world. Although Psyche doesn’t consume pomegranate seeds, her task to retrieve beauty from the Underworld draws parallels to Persephone’s story and highlights the theme of transformation through descent into darkness.
Modern Adaptations in Popular Culture
The myth of Eros and Psyche has been reinterpreted many times in modern media, each adaptation reflecting different aspects of their relationship.
1. “Lore Olympus” (Webtoon, 2018–Present)
The ongoing webcomic “Lore Olympus” by Rachel Smythe has gained global popularity for its retelling of Greek myths, including the stories of Hades and Persephone, and Eros and Psyche. In this version, Eros and Psyche’s relationship is explored with nuance, focusing on Eros’ vulnerability and Psyche’s strength. Smythe’s portrayal gives Psyche more agency, though the underlying power imbalance remains.
2. « Cupid and Psyche » in Classical Art and Literature
Many adaptations of the myth have focused on the beauty of their love story, but in recent years, authors and artists have examined the darker aspects. Novels like “Till We Have Faces” by C.S. Lewis offer a psychological exploration of the myth, questioning the nature of divine love and human suffering. Lewis’ work, in particular, examines how love can be manipulative and self-serving.
3. « Psych » in Popular TV Shows
While not directly related to the myth, shows like « Psych » (2006–2014) playfully reference the idea of hidden identities and secrets in relationships, echoing the dynamic between Eros and Psyche. In many episodes, the idea of trust, betrayal, and curiosity mirrors the challenges faced by Psyche when she uncovers the truth about her mysterious lover.
Is Eros and Psyche’s Relationship Toxic?
Looking at the myth from a modern perspective, many elements of Eros and Psyche’s relationship can be viewed as toxic. Eros’ initial control over Psyche, his abandonment when she violates his trust, and the grueling trials she must undergo to win him back all point to a power imbalance that characterizes many unhealthy relationships.
- Lack of Transparency: Eros’ decision to hide his identity from Psyche creates a foundation of secrecy, preventing true intimacy. This mirrors toxic relationships where one partner withholds information or controls aspects of the other’s life.
- Punishment for Curiosity: Psyche’s curiosity leads to her abandonment. In many toxic relationships, questioning the partner’s motives or actions results in emotional punishment, as seen in Eros’ immediate departure after Psyche breaks the one rule he set.
- Tests of Devotion: The fact that Psyche must complete impossible tasks to prove her worth and win back Eros’ love is a classic sign of manipulation. In healthy relationships, love should not be conditional or earned through suffering.
꧁A Complex Love Story with Dark Undertones
The myth of Eros and Psyche remains a powerful story of love and transformation, but when examined through the lens of modern relationship dynamics, it reveals troubling aspects of control, secrecy, and manipulation. While Psyche’s perseverance is admirable, the myth also serves as a cautionary tale about the dangers of power imbalances and toxic love.
As this myth continues to inspire modern adaptations in books, films, and webcomics like “Lore Olympus,” its themes remain relevant to discussions about the complexities of love and the potential for relationships to become unhealthy.
